Friday, January 30, 2009

Moving On...

This was a very difficult decision for me to make. I've decided that I need to leave this blog right where it is and not bring it with me to my new bloggy home, It's time to make a big change... take a massive leap of faith... and just pray it all goes well.

Over the last year, I've dealt with a lot of situations, good and bad. Through personal reflection and the support of friends, both on-line and off, I made it through a really rough patch in my life. That patch was something I had to walk through... a walk I had avoided in my denial for many years before the first step towards mental freedom. It started when someone posed the question:

"If you knew you couldn't fail, what would you do?"

The last time I answered that question, I was afraid of my answer. I knew what needed to happen... what I needed to do... but I wasn't sure I wanted to know how it would end up. I was frozen when I stopped to let myself wonder what it would look like on the other side of the transformation. I was worried about who I would lose and who I might become.

I thought of a card a friend once gave me. A butterfly in a cocoon was afraid to come out, sure that she would fall to the ground. But she was reassured by one already in flight that she would be okay and, more than okay, life was going to be beautiful. That's how I've felt this year. I had to just believe that life would be beautiful. Some things still aren't resolved. Mostly, though, I can say that my life is full of joy.

And I am ready to take flight.


Thanks to Gayle from who asked me the question again recently when we finally got to meet at the top of the city on a gloriously clear and cold night in San Diego. "If you couldn't fail, what would you do?" I don't know, I answered. "Yes, you do Sugar!" Her eyes pierced through me.

She was right... I do know.


Naomi said...

That was a beautiful story...maybe that's my problem, i'm stuck in the cocoon...anyway, I'm so happy for you! I guess I should delete the widget and add the new site? remember...when you're perez rich and famous, you're buying the drinks! xo

Mel @ A Box of Chocolates said...

What a great question! I'm still pondering it for myself, but will keep you posted. I wish you luck in wherever life takes you.

Dee Dee said...

Sugar, thanks for being so transparent and sharing with us. That *is* a piercing question. And it keeps me going because the only way to fail is to give up. The journey might take longer than we expect but we will succeed if we just never quit our dreams and goals.

Marfa said...

Sugar, I'm in the process of coming out of that cocoon and you're right, you don't know exactly what awaits you on the other side. But one thing I know for sure (kinda feel like Oprah there for a minute) You will be much happier trying to achieve what you want than sitting inside that dark cocoon watching other butterflies fluttering around.

I Am Boymom said...

I am so happy for you! I am soo struggling with the whole going forward thing, it's nice to see someoone work their way through it. I look forward to following you on your journey! Thanks for sharing your thoughts...they have made me think today.

Melissa, Multi-Tasking Mama said...

You go girl! Only fabulous things in store for you- I asked the magic eight ball ;p

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If I knew I couldn't fail I would play Ice Hockey forever.

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