Wednesday, December 3, 2008

I'm Not That Kind of Mom

It dawned on me that many people being directed here from the blogoshpere might be wondering if this is a "Mommy Blog." Since humans like things in categories, I might bug you a little... and I'm okay with that. While I am a Mom...

I'm not *that* kind of mom.

I'm not the kind of mom that makes breakfast and packs lunches and whistles the whole time. I'm the mom that makes her kids get their own cereal, not only because I want them to learn to do things on their own, but because I'm a late riser and like to sit with my coffee on the patio in peace during my ME time before starting my day as "mom."

I'm not the kind of mom that cares if the Chicken Dinos will cause my children to lose 3 days at the end of their life. Chances are, they will live full and happy lives regardless. I do buy organic milk and eggs and read labels like crazy, but I need easy. Microwavable chicken in the shape of T Rexes make my life easy!

I'm not the kind of mom that will smile politely when your child is being naughty and say "Oh, how cute." I will call him out on his behavior, usually beginning my interaction with a strong, "Hey buddy! Don't do that!" If you have a problem with that, control your young...

I'm not the kind of mom that will let a mom bash another mom while she's not there to defend herself. I don't think there is anything that shows the ugly side of humanity more than a bunch of women clawing at the reputation of another woman. I'd love to see those same catty women try to say this with a straight face to their kids: "If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all."

What kind of mom am I?

I'm the mom that will squirt whipped cream into her kids mouths when they say they want dessert.
I'm the mom that will suffer mess after mess so that her kids can be creative.
I'm the mom that screws up... a lot... and cries about it... a lot.
I'm the mom that is ALWAYS late. To everything.
I'm the mom that hates homework more than her kids ever could. That's one reason we homeschool.
I'm the mom that hates volunteering in the classroom more than she hates homework. Another bonus reason for homeschooling.
I'm the mom who never folds the laundry and some mornings forgets to check if the kids brushed their teeth before leaving the house.
I'm the mom who tells the kids to turn the music up.
I'm the mom that unabashedly and imperfectly loves her kids.

I'm responsible... but I'm not perfect. And I don't ever want to be.

So I blog and I happen to be a mom. I guess I'm a mommy blogger if that's how you want to categorize me. But don't forget... I'm not *that* kind of mommy.

And if that bugs you... don't look.

...

45 comments:

FireMom said...

You're my kinda mom.

Also, with the "HEY BUDDY, DON'T DO THAT." Can you bring that and some TRexes 'round these parts? I've got a three year old with "broken ears." He told me son.

GNO Gals, Jyl and Carissa said...

Shut up. YOu really homeschool? I think that's both awesome and crazy and fun and insane at the same time.

I love the whipping cream stuff... Mommyblogger.

Carissa

MonkeyGirl said...

Chicken Dinos are the best! I never knew they had such things and fed them to the M&M's last night. They ate every single T-Rex and that other one (stegasourus? - we just called them dino-sarus!) and I didn't have to fight them one bit!

showingoffmyassets said...

You are the kind of mom I am too. You have the priorities right and I applaud the way that you put it down in your post. You are all right in my book...

Naomi said...

see...this is why we're friends...I could've written more than half of your list myself lol.

bought the couch tonight! pics to follow soon.

Kim N said...

Great post! You sound like a great mom. The mommy bloggers who post perfect lives and perfect children...are lying. Nobody is perfect and in sharing our imperfections along with our strengths it builds us all up.

Deb said...

i'm not going anywhere! great post... great cooking tips, too!

My name is Andy. said...

That's the kinda mom I strive to be!

Domestic Goddess (In Training) said...

I want to be your type of mom. But, I have to admit... I always fold the laundry. So, I am a whip cream squirter, music turning upper, dino nugget making anal laundry folder. Can I still be your kind of mom?

My Trendy Tykes said...

Here....Here....


and AMEN TOO!

Linda

Sugar said...

I'm so glad to be in such awesome company. Screw perfection! Love you guys...

Sara said...

Are you describing me....or yourself:) We homeschool in part for those very reasons...I have 4 loads of laundry piled next to me I need to fold....and we just had PBJ for dinner...but my kids had at least a dozen kisses each today! Who wants to be Brie from DH anyways?! (In my husband's dreams:))

Corina said...

Damn straight.

Oh.... and I LOVE you for sticking up for other moms when they are not there to defend themselves. That is quite possibly the biggest pet peeve I have!

nicole viola said...

I like your style, Sugar! The more whip cream, the better! :)

Thanks for your honesty- it's refreshing!

Simply BB said...

awesome. i am that mom too! nice to meet ya!

smiles4u said...

I could have written most of this list myself so I guess I am not that kind of mom either. Sounds like you're a great mom just because you are "you".

Marfa said...

Kitty?? Is that you? Oh...umm..sorry...I thought I was reading my best friend's blog :-D

JR Moreau said...

Great piece! Anti-helicopter mom it sounds like. Very Gen Y if I must say so ;-)

* TONYA * said...

I love this post. I am so 'your' kind of mum too ... okay, but I definitely have a 'mummy blog' most of the time. We are a homeschool family too and I have an addiction to whipped cream, stuff the kids, it's going in my mouth ha ha.

I found you on twitter yesterday and noticed you are in SD too.

Oh and we had chicken dino's and fries for dinner last night :)

Melissa, Multi-Tasking Mama said...

Love it! There is room for all of us mama bloggers out there and I unabashedly correct other people's kids b/c someone's gotta do it, right? LOL

BedsideTalesMan said...

Great post. I just got back fromthe store wih Dino Chicken nuggets.

I have also been thinking about homeschooling.

Love your blog

Marta said...

Oh, I'm gonna look--cause you seem like the kind of mom I want to read. Hurray for imperfections.

Sugar said...

Wow... who knew so many of people squirt whipped cream in their mouths! You guys RAWK!

We just ran out of dinos. Have to make a run to the store now!

jess said...

we're a lot alike. LOL. would you be pissed or flattered if i blog about what kind of mom i am? you've inspired me a bit...

D'Arcy said...

wow. i hope to be this kind of mom one day,

Ohana Mama said...

So I'm not alone? You've made me feel better :)

Amy said...

Love it. Good stuff.

Sugar said...

Jess: Feel free to do a post like this one. I think the more we break down that awful image of perfection, the better off we will ALL be as women and moms.

Do you all know this is the most comments I think I've ever received on a post. Hmmm... very interesting...

InTheFastLane said...

I LOVE dino nuggets! & my husband is just as happy as when I actually cook.

I am Boymom said...

Thank you! Now i can tell my husband that I am not the only one who doesn't fold laundry. We pretty much dress from the dryer. And the whole HOMEWORK thing! I still haven't made the transition to homeschooling, but am getting close. So glad you found my blog, glad I found yours, you are goin in my reader!

Melissa @ The Inspired Room said...

You are my new best friend. I'm the same way on almost ALL of that stuff. Except for I don't homeschool. But some days I wish I did because I hate the homework and am not a good volunteer.

Dino buddies rule. And whipped cream in your mouth is the best dessert ever.

{high fives}

Catie said...

Chicken flavored dinos are my favoritest thing to feed my kids!

and I need my coffee in peace too!

barbarabaker said...

BRAVO!!! ANCORE!!!

That post was pure genious, it was like the Micheal Jordan of blogging...couldn't have been written better by anyone else!!!!

I love your style of writing, I love what you have to say and how you choose to say it.

Keep um commin'!!!
-barbarabaker

Reading this post right now just brightened my day and has left a smile on my face!!!!!

Brian B. Carter, MS, LAc said...

you rock. i'm not sure what kind of mom that makes you. except your kind. sugar mom.

'Nette said...

You're my kind of mom :) and there is nothing like CPT, in this case, California People Time :)

And I have to fold the laundry otherwise I can't tell the clean from the dirty. With my kids, I can't trust the smell test :)

Actually, I don't fold, I seperate into baskets... oh well!

watchoutmomshome said...

You are my sister in spirit. I cited this post in watchoutmomshome.wordpress.com

Ironic that my domestic failures are an underlying stressor in stuff leading up to my upcoming divorce. You helped my crystallize my discontent. Blessings

Lisa said...

Thank goodness, a true break from the *mommy blogosphere* that I just don't fit into. You, Sugar, are my kind of Mamma! And, I'm right here with you.

Love it!

LKassenbrock said...

This almost made me cry! I'm not a mom yet, but you are an inspiration :)

Andrew Weaver said...

I'm not a mom. Won't ever be one. I'm not a dad. May be one some day. This was great. I loved it through and through. I also appreciate that you have the courage and strength to take on the responsibility of homeschooling you children. I was homeschooled up to middle school, private school up to high school, and then finally public school in high school.

I respect any parent willing to take on home schooling. When it is done right, it can be such a valuable experience to your children. One they will not look back on with regret.

New here, looking forward to following you and even your Tweets. :)

Andrew Weaver said...

Oh yeah, I'm a wannabe professional photographer (still learning myself how). That's how I stumbled across you.

ModernMommy said...

Just came across your website from theintegratedmother and I love this blogpost. My favorite one is the bashing of other mothers. There is nothing I hate more than when mothers judge eachother for the choices they have made.
Thanks for posting this!

Jill

Keep It Classy, Jen said...

Sugar, you have SO much fire in you in this post. Love this fire mama! You are NOT that kind of mom for sure!

Rebecca Anne said...

This was a fantatic entry and one I could completely relate to. I've never been one of those Moms, pearls and pancakes and the perfect home. But, I'd like to think I'm a good Mom. I'm a mom, who blogs, but I've felt left out in some way, because I've never considered myself a Mommy blogger either. Anyway, I enjoyed this a lot and leave with a smile.
Rebecca

jana said...

So late finding you but I am kind of floored on how I relate---my lil ones each get a squirt (ok 2) of whipped cream in their mouths in the morning b4 leaving for daycare---all of it, except I don't homeschool (kids are both under 4) is hauntingly familiar and I must say, refreshingly validating to boot.

thanks,

jana

CaseyDeuce said...

Sugar.... you're my hero!! Have you been peeking in my windows and doing the same things as me???